If I’ve learned anything in this life, it’s that men and women are so very different. How we act and react to each other can be both wonderful and frustrating.
Take for instance dirty laundry. A friend of mine has been struggling for years to get her husband to throw his dirty clothes in the laundry hamper. Apparently, he just tosses the filthy fabrics on the floor right next to the bin but not inside of it.
My husband did that once, so I served him his dinner on the kitchen floor right next to the table. I’m thinking he got the point because I never had to pick up his laundry from the floor again.
My adult son occasionally leaves the toilet seat up when he comes to visit. I asked him why he leaves it up, and he said he forgets to put it back down.
Occasionally, I leave his beer cooler lid up on a hot summer day during a picnic or other outdoor gathering. He gets mad but, oops, I forgot. He’ll get it one day.
On the side of men, I don’t understand why women have to go to the bathroom in “herds.” If I don’t have to go, I don’t. Anytime you want to watch large migrations, just observe women when one of them has to use the restroom, for cryin’ out loud.
I do not understand why some men think it’s OK to use dish soap for dishes, shampoo, pet baths and body wash, not to mention car washing detergent. By that reasoning, I should just use an SOS pad as a loofah in the shower.
When women look into a mirror, they usually see extra weight. Often a man sees a “six-pack” in his midsection. My brother used to do that until I gave him an actual six-pack and told him to lay down, where I placed it on his gut. That’s the only way he’ll have “six-pack” abs, no matter how much he sucks in his tummy.
Men are happy with two outfits and a pair of underwear for a week, whereas women never have enough to wear. One day my husband asked me if I had enough shoes; I told him to go look in his tackle box and tell me if he had enough fishing lures.
Men are typically bigger than women in size, which means their bladders are as well, so then why do some guys use a public tree? If a woman can hold it until she gets somewhere with facilities, shouldn’t they be able to as well?
Some men put empty containers back in the fridge, but women will spend 25 minutes telling a man why that’s wrong.
For all of our differences, one thing remains the same – we both agree to disagree on how to do things. We need them, and they need us, so it all works out.
Good Lord, my husband just used the sponge I washed my dishes with to wipe up a spill on the floor.
Anngee Quinones-Belian lives in Murphy. She loves humor and believes the world needs more of it. Email her at anngeeq@gmail.com.