You never know what you’re going to run across in the Cherokee Scout’s archives – from drunken roosters getting into bar trouble (it was fowl) to shooting a propane tank “just to see what would happen” (it was loud) – but the biggest front-page headline in the June 4, 1959, edition demanded a second, and then a third, look:
“ ‘Jail’ Ready To Punish Men Who Fail To Grow Beards” it boldly says in the capitalize-every-word headline style of the day. At least the word “jail” was in quote marks.
When I turned 19 years old, I grew my first beard. Not exactly sure why, other than that this was probably the first time in my life the fuzz on my face was ready to graduate from peach to darker tones. Since then, I’ve spent about 80 percent of my days with some sort of hair taking up space upon my face, which also happens to be my wife’s preference. (And that counts a lot.)
Despite my appreciation of the non-clean shaven world, never in my wildest facial hair daydreams did I think one day a beard might be the difference between freedom and captivity. So it was time to take a deeper dive into what was happening here six and a half years before I arrived on the planet.
There were several stories underneath that lead headline – Young Harris College was offering summer courses, seminary student James Pippin was helping minister at two local Presbyterian churches, Fred McDonald of Ebernezer (yes, that’s how it was spelled) got caught with 100 gallons of mash in a still raid and there was going to be a talent hunt in Franklin led by someone who apparently was somebody – but the only one that could have gone with our primary headline had the secondary headline “Schedule Of Events For Wagon Train Celebration Announced By Committee.”
This story says a lot in few words.
“A slab jail has been erected on the square to accommodate violators of the no-shaving ordinance as the Tellico Plains to Murphy Wagon Train Celebration gets underway.”
I like that this was written from the perspective that everyone would already know about the no-shaving ordinance – like, duh – making the “slab jail” a more newsworthy item.
“The rules of the celebration calls for the men to wear beards and Western dress, while the women sport gay ‘90s dresses and bonnets, along with pointed shoes.”
There was no mention whether there was a jail for women who wore non-gay clothing and rounded shoes.
“The jail was built by the American Legion. The beard requirements went into effect June 1. To date, there has been none arrested and put in the wooden jail for lack of beard or Western dress.”
Aha! So Eastern clothes also could have put you behind bars?
While asking for donations of hay, Wagon Train organizers did not say whether that hay would have been good for one get-out-of-beard-jail-free card. The rules for the celebration seemed quite clearly in favor of hairy men.
“1.) All men must grow mustaches, beards or sideburns. Those who frown on such practice will be allowed to buy a $5 shaving license. Those who do not comply will be confined in the American Legion Stockade.”
This was serious stuff. Pretty sure those Legionnaires were fans of the Second Amendment, too.
“2.) During the week of July 3, the men must wear cowboy hats, and these will be on sale by the Cherokee Garden Club.”
The truth is finally revealed. This was all a shakedown for the Garden Club.
Items 3 and 4 confirmed that women must wear bonnets and frontier costumers, albeit without the fear of frontier justice. But the last one contained one last piece of nonprofit blackmail.
“5.) All persons will be required to wear the official Wagon Train ‘Button,’ which will be on sale shortly by the Murphy Business & Professional Women’s Club at the price of 35 cents.”
In case you’re wondering, the Wagon Train schedule of events that year included a beauty contest at the swimming pool, a rodeo, professional wrestling matches and a costume ball. So maybe asking men to grow a beard wasn’t too big of a deal since you got all that fun in return.
Of course, this was all in fun for charity, but don’t think that would get you some slack cut if you forgot to not shave for a couple of weeks and ended up in the stockade. If we tried something like that this year, perhaps the Legion could team up with the Bigfoot Refinery Beard Co. to teach those faces a thing a two. David Brown is publisher of the Cherokee Scout. You can reach him by phone, 837-5122; email, dbrown@cherokeescout.com; or on Twitter @daviddBstroh.