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With Valentine’s Day just around the corner, I started thinking about things I could bestow upon my own sweetie pie during the festive day.
I did some casual research to find out just how folks in other areas around the world celebrate the holiday that’s filled with various goodies.
Personally, I’d rather have the love of my life clean the toilet and empty out the vacuum cleaner bag than to buy me chocolates that will be devoured in three seconds and flowers I have to maintain until they rot. However, to each his own.
In Germany, lovers give chocolate pigs and gingerbread to each other. I’m not clear on whether the pig is chocolate itself or if real pigs are covered in the brown sweetness and given to the recipient. I had a classmate once that covered himself in chocolate, for what reason we never knew but the second grader was suspended from school for a week.
Some countries celebrate Valentine’s Day with mass weddings but that seems somewhat impersonal. Do those weddings include each bride and groom’s entire wedding party? What if the wedding gifts get mixed up or folks can’t agree on which songs to play? Besides, if there are any nightmare brides in the group, and there always is, that could result in raging estrogen tantrums of epic proportions. Although memorable, those aren’t the photos I’d want in my wedding album.
I read somewhere that in Japan, women give chocolates to men but I think women give enough to men already so really, the holiday should just be about the women.
In Russia and Canada, sweethearts celebrate a romantic dinner at home. It’s hard to make some meals romantic like TV dinners or pizza but I imagine it’s possible. So basically, the woman cooks dinner at home as usual. Just because candles are involved doesn’t mean she doesn’t still have to do the dishes and clean up the kitchen.
In Italy, some people give keys to each other symbolizing the unlocking of one’s heart. Keys to a new car would also be nice.
In Denmark, crushes send their sweethearts “joke letters” but if one feels the need to give their hunny a “Dear John letter” that could be confusing and somewhat cruel.
A friend of mine gave his wife a Swiffer and a set of dish towels with hearts on them last year. It doesn’t really count as a gift if it falls under chores. When my husband gives me a house cleaning “gift” for a holiday or birthday, I in turn gift him with an automotive tire cleaning brush, a grill scraper or a box of trash bags for yard work. I also toss in a romantic novel or book about what women really want in life.
As for myself, I’m planning on cleaning a few of my husband’s prized possessions as he’s always so busy. I know if someone cleaned something of mine that saved me the time, I’d appreciate it.
He has a couple of old baseball jerseys in storage that could use a good washing. They have red clay or something all over them from some guys who wore them named Micky Mantle and Joey Dimaggio – probably old friends of his. It seems like a shame to just let them stay so dirty. Of course, I’ll also give him a box of chocolates.
Anngee Quinones-Belian of Murphy is a staff correspondent for the Cherokee Scout. Her humor column runs every other week. Email her at anngeeq@gmail.com.