 |
Happy belated Mother’s Day to all the moms who enjoyed 24 hours of celebrating the years of hard work you’ve put in. Some of those short-lived celebratory hours at night didn’t even count because you were busy sleeping. Yes – moms are busy somehow even when they appear to be resting. Here’s a look at how my day went.
I was awakened by my son early in the morning because he couldn’t find his favorite shirt, and he was wondering out loud what was for breakfast. He’s old enough to pour milk over cereal, so why he woke me up from a peaceful dream about being stranded on a deserted island alone, I’ll never know.
After making breakfast, doing the dishes, vacuuming and a host of other exciting chores because that’s what moms do no matter what day of the year it is, I got ready to run a few errands.
I was on my way to Walmart and was keeping up with the traffic when I was pulled over for speeding. We were all going the same speed but my car was the one that screamed look at me.
While I was out and about, I needed to use the restroom so I stopped by the public bathroom in downtown. Panic set in when the handle broke off, and I was unable to open the door. I couldn’t reach my husband or kids, and my phone was nearly out of power so my last call was to 911 for help. I’m fairly sure the dispatcher also heard me bark in frustration that, “there’s no toilet paper in here either,” as I banged on the door before hanging up.
By the time I finally got out of the bathroom, I realized I was running late for an appointment. I still had to navigate the roundabout, which isn’t easy when you suffer from vertigo.
Anyway, I missed my turn to exit out of the town’s whirlybout twice while going in circles because I got dizzy and couldn’t see clearly. These circular roadways also remind me of my son’s beloved and now-deceased hamster. Weasel died in a fatal accident while on his running wheel when he tripped and was thrown across his cage. We miss him, it still hurts.
After my meeting, I hurried back home because I knew my kids would be needing me for everything. I ran inside the house because I had to use the restroom again. That’s what happens to a woman after having children – actually, it may be due to aging, but I’m not sure which it is, so I’d rather blame the consequences of giving birth over getting older.
Ten seconds after the bathroom door closed the knocking began. What is it that makes a few minutes of alone time the perfect opportunity for children to desperately need something at that moment in time?
I picked up dirty socks, stepped on Legos, grabbed an empty milk container from inside the fridge and brought a teenage girl back from the depths of despair over some guy. By the end of the day I was worn out. I kinda get why some animals in the wild eat their young.
However, Mother’s Day ended up turning out pretty good after all. My husband took my Uncle Vinny to play pickleball when he showed up on our doorstep. My groom of 12 years wanted to spare me any potential fallout from that clumsy ape.
I felt bad when he returned back home. He had two black eyes because apparently my uncle lost his racket while serving the ball, and it flew across the court, hitting my husband in the eye – twice.
With all the usual day’s bickering, lapses in chores and moments of complete and utter irritation, Mother’s Day was just another great day to say, “It’s good to be alive!”
Anngee Quinones-Belian of Murphy is a staff correspondent for the Cherokee Scout. Her humor column runs every other week. Email her at anngeeq@gmail.com.